Friday, October 29, 2010
Perfectionism ups your risk for binge eating, depression, and other problems.
Constantly striving to live a faultless life increases your risk of a very imperfect outcome—early death. Experts specializing in perfectionism recently convened at an Association for Psychological Science Convention in Boston to present research looking at perfectionism and its effects on health, ranging from loss of self-esteem and resilience to increased stress and risk of death. It can even interfere with effectively dealing in a crisis situation. "Even though these impossibly high standards are self-imposed, the true perfectionists find it hard to relinquish the high self-expectations of performance, or to settle for more realistic standards, even during times of severe emergencies requiring them to act fast," explains Prem Fry, PhD, professor of psychology at Trinity Western University in British Columbia.
The Details: At the convention, researchers specializing in perfectionist behavior shared their research, including Fry, whose recent study of older adults found a 51 percent reduced life-expectancy rate in perfectionists when compared to non-perfectionists. Other health ailments have also been linked to perfectionism. Other researchers have linked perfectionism to binge eating, hoarding, anxiety, substance abuse, and an increased risk of oxidative and nitrosative stress, which cause cell damage and inflammation, leading to a whole host of serious health problems. The good news is that not all perfectionists' traits mean bad news. Some of Fry's other work, published earlier this year, has found that perfectionists living with type 2 diabetes tend to more effectively control and monitor their condition. "Compared to non-perfectionists, they followed the treatment regimen more thoroughly and, as a result, lived healthier and longer lives."
Thursday, September 23, 2010
1. Step Back (For a Second)
Figure out why you want more free time. “You can’t win a game you haven’t defined,” says David Allen, a productivity expert and the author of the best seller Getting Things Done. You’ll be more motivated to change if you have a specific goal.
Make a wish list. Write down all the activities that you long to do more of―whether they’re things that make you happy, relaxed, sane(r), or all three. Rank the items in order of importance to you, then pick one or two to focus on. (Once you get the hang of this system, you can address the rest.)
Now write down how you really spend your time. If it’s all one makelunchcarpoolrunaroundlikecrazy blur, keep a detailed diary for a few days. (Want some encouragement―and comfort that someone’s life is as crazy as yours? You might be surprised by how little time you spend doing things you love most. The key question to keep asking is, Are you spending your time on the right things?
2: Give Up What You Can
Consider this: Devoting more time to what you love can help you get more done overall. Says Neil Fiore, Ph.D., a psychologist in Berkeley, California, “Research shows that to be productive and creative, you must make time for recreation and relaxation. Trying to skimp on them hurts your motivation and often leads you to procrastinate.” Plus, being a little selfish will keep you from becoming burned out or cranky. To find ways to free up time, take a look at your list of current activities and ask yourself four questions:
What can I delegate? OK, so maybe your 11-year-old can’t load the dishwasher as well as you can. Hand over that task and you’ve got 10 minutes to spend on something more fulfilling. The fact that you’re teaching your child responsibility―with, yes, an occasional eye roll―is a bonus. If you’ve reflexively been handling most of the household duties, turn some of them over to your spouse. Try similar strategies at work: Give junior staffers assignments that stretch their capabilities rather than doing the job yourself.
What can I outsource? Housecleaning is an obvious answer, but also think about things like tutoring for your kids. Before you decide you can’t afford this, scrutinize your spending. Chances are, there’s a way to reallocate your resources. If you need more convincing, calculate what your time is worth, says Timothy Ferriss, a time-management expert. To get your “hourly rate,” cut the last three zeros off your annual salary, then halve that number. So if you make $60,000 a year, your hourly rate is $30. “If it takes you three hours to clean the house each week, that’s $90 worth of your time,” he says.
What can I do less well (at least sometimes)? When something you’re working on is good enough, stop. It’s a waste of time to do everything perfectly, such as polishing the underside of the banister. Instead, focus on doing the important things adequately.
What distractions can I limit, if not eliminate?
Shut the door. Seriously. If you have work to do, make it clear that you need to be left alone.
At work, check your e-mail only twice a day―at noon and at 4 p.m. “I’ve found those are the times when you’re most likely to have responses to your previously sent e-mails,” says Ferriss. And use the auto-respond feature: When you’re swamped, direct e-mailers to an assistant or, with his or her permission, a colleague.
At home, give your BlackBerry a rest.
As for TV, watch a show you love, then turn off the set. The average American spends 2.4 hours a day in front of the tube, but that investment yields sparse rewards. Studies show that watching TV doesn’t make people nearly as happy as activities that really engage them, like playing tennis, taking a walk, and eating with family.
Friday, September 10, 2010
If you think winning a man's heart largely boils down to your looks, you're wrong.
When it comes to off-putting dating behavior, men commit plenty of dumb moves. He wears sneakers at a nice restaurant. He goes on and on about his boring job. He asks you pretty much nothing about yourself… and still tries for a good-night kiss at the end of the date (as if). If you find yourself on a date like this, I don’t blame you for passing on another encounter. But what about those cases where the guy does win you over… and yet never calls again? Have you ever stopped to wonder what went wrong? While you might think winning a man’s heart largely boils down to your looks, you’re wrong. Below are five key things that well-intentioned women do that make men bail. Keep them in mind as you search for your Mr. Right.
Reason 1: You talk, but don’t listen
Women are sharers. It’s culturally ingrained. You may talk to your best friend or mom five times a day and think nothing of it. Every detail is relevant, and nothing can be left out in the telling of a story. Problem is, men don’t generally communicate that way. So try to consider the ebb and flow of a normal conversation. If he hasn’t spoken in awhile, ask him a question (and not a vague “So tell me about you,” which will make feel self-conscious and put on the spot). If he’s telling a story, try doing a follow-up query instead of refocusing the spotlight on yourself (“You like to travel? Let me tell you about how I backpacked through the Amazon!”). And if it’s occurred to you that you haven’t yet learned a thing about your date, try listening for a bit. It’s not that we’re not interested in getting to know you, it’s that we’d be thrilled if you were interested in getting to know us, too. Browse Local Singles at Match.com on Yahoo!
Reason 2: You use conversation as therapy
Talking about your evil ex-boyfriend. Talking about your hatred of your job. Talking about your strained relationship with your mother. It’s not that the bad stuff is irrelevant, it’s that it’s inappropriate. Being negative might be an effective way of winning an election, but it’s not exactly endearing on a date. Even if you feel compelled to touch on such subjects, consider your tone when doing so. And consider how you’d feel if a man were to share his inner turmoil with you too soon.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Learning a language can be a long daunting task. It takes normally a baby over 2 years before they start to really grasp a langauge. So learning a new one can be quite a challenge.
This is one language though that is universal. The language of love and dating. Here is a list of ways to say I love you in many languages.
Afrikaans - Ek het jou lief
Afrikaans - Ek het jou liefe
Apache - Shi ingolth-a
Albanian - Te dua
Alentejano (Portugal) - Gosto De Ti, Porra!
Alsacien - Ich hoan dich gear
Amharic - Afekrishalehou
Arabic - Ana Behibak (to a male)
Arabic - Ana Behibek (to a female)
Arabic (Formal Arabic) - Ooheboki (to a female)
Arabic (Formal Arabic) - Ooheboka (to a male)
Arabic - Ib'n hebbak
Arabic - Ana Ba-heb-bak
Arabic - nhebuk
Armenian - Yes kez si'rumem
Armenian - Sirem zk 'ez
Assamese - Moi tomak bhal pau
Aztec - Nimitzlaco'tla
Bari ( A Sudanese Language) - Nan nyanyar do (I love you)
Bari ( A Sudanese Language) - Nan nyanyar do parik (I love you very much)
Batak - Holong rohangku di ho
Bavarian - I mog di narrisch gern
Bengali - Ami tomAy bhAlobAshi
Bengali - Ami tomake bhalo basi
Bicol - Namumutan ta ka
Bolivian Quechua - Qanta munani
Bulgarian - Obicham te
Burmese - Chit pa de
Imagine if alien visitors asked you to explain the act of kissing. What would you say?
Think about it. If a spaceship full of aliens landed on earth to observe human behavior, how on earth would we explain the act of kissing? One person touches another person with their lips. Not, of course, lips to lips alone. Lips to cheek, lips to neck, lips to – well, just about any other body part can be considered. Imagine the polite but nevertheless obvious squirming with embarrassment that could be involved on either or both sides of the species divide.
An immediate question might be what is the act for? The reply could constitute the making of a list that even the most avid list-seeker on the internet might find overlong. Tongue nevertheless in cheek, most people would associate kissing with love and sexual desire and the aliens would probably accept this as part of our self-evidently bizarre mating habits. When this basic question is elaborated on, however, to include greeting, respect, sympathy, luck giving, affection and, most puzzlingly, false empathy then who would blame our visitors from outer space for turning tail and leaving this planet in a huff?
The origins of the word are old enough – the Old English language gifted the world the word kiss from their own – ‘cyssan’. Origins of the word aside, the reason for this most simple yet complex act to exist is still perplexing philematologists (those who study kissing). They cannot decide whether or not kissing is a learned behavior or if it is instinctive.
Kissing is often an overlooked art when it comes to seducing your partner. Obviously there are many types of kisses and they can be used in different settings. Here are some kisses that are used with partners.
Greeting kisses with your partner
• The hello kiss: A quick kiss on the lips which says 'hey babe, how was your day'.
• The hello kiss +: A bit longer than the hello kiss, this kiss says 'hey babe, I was thinking about you today' (eyebrows raised).
• Not even in the door kiss: A passionate kiss which says, well! It kind of speaks for itself.
Lounging about the house kisses:
• Just a quick kiss: A quick kiss just to remind them you love them
• Kids are out playing kiss: A longer kiss followed by the words 'the kids are out playing.................'
• You're getting it tonight kiss: passionate, playful, long and hard saying 'I'm horny!!!'
•Just before sleep kiss: A quick peck on the cheek or lips to say 'goodnight babe'.
Making love kisses:
• Thank god, the painters have left kiss: Menstrual cycle is over and it's time to get back on track
• I really want you kiss: long, passionate, all over the face type of kiss saying 'I'm hungry'
• The spiritual kiss: slow, long, softer, passionate which says 'I love you on a deeper level'
There are a million more types of kisses I've only named 10 of our most popular, sorry! 10 of the most popular ones I have read about and seen on TV. But, what makes a good kiss? How can you improve your kissing? Here are 7 tips to make that perfect kiss:
1.Men: Have a good shave, by this I mean a close shave. Women prefer passionate kissing when the man has had a close shave rather than the man with stubble.
2.An obvious one this but do not eat strong tasting foods like curry or garlic, unless your partner is eating it too.
3.Do not kiss your partner if you have a mouth infection of any kind, viruses can be carried through the saliva when kissing.
4.Make use of your partners body and kiss them all over, kissing is not just meant for the mouth.
5.Vary your kisses from soft, long kisses to hard and passionate kisses
6.Kiss with your eyes open and maintain eye contact, most people close their eyes when kissing, so keeping your eyes open can be different and fun.
7.Do it in private. Most people hate seeing other people kissing in public. I don't mean the quick pecks I mean the passionate ‘I really want you kiss'. Have you ever seen this in the high street, it's gross. Leave the passionate kisses in the privacy of your home or where nobody can see you.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Being romantic is more than just a bunch of red roses and a box of chocolates, it is showing your partner that you love, respect and admire them for who they are and it is form of showing them how much they mean to you. Romance comes in all shapes and forms, big and small, from that small gesture of giving them your last rolo, to that romantic getaway. The most common misconception about being romantic is that you have to spend a lot of money. Money should be no factor in being romantic, as true romance doesn’t mean you spent loads of money on them, but that you put long hard thought into how you could really ‘woo’ them.
Red Roses and chocolates is a very popular and good way of being romantic, as all women love them, but instead of just giving them to her, why don’t you go that bit further to really impress her. Set a scenario for giving these gifts. Good scenario’s would be the place you first kissed, where you went on your first date, or even where you first met. None of these places cost, but they show her how dear this place is to you, as it was a milestone in your relationship.
Ring her. No matter how busy you are or where you are, ring her to let her know that you miss her and are thinking of her. Ask how she is, what she’s up too, is she having a good day. Take real interest and show her that you care. This means so much.
Set the scenario in the bedroom. When she’s out, set up the bedroom to create a romantic atmosphere. This can include tidying the bedroom, changing the linen, set some soft music, light scented candles, dim the light, get massage oils and get a chilled bottle of wine. Create a relaxed setting where you can really cut off from the outside world, and be together. Give each other massages and talk. Show them physically how much they mean to you.
Overall there are no rules for how to be romantic; it changes from person to person. Just be personal and think of what would they want the most. It’s all about showing your partner how much they mean to you and it’s your form of telling them. And remember, actions say more than a thousand words ever could!
Then there are the men who know the secrets of romance. For example, on the reality shows such as the Bachelor and Who Wants to Marry (whatever), it's pretty obvious the men who are the most romantic stick around the longest and are chosen in the end.
Why? Not because they are rich, good looking, have great jobs, or any of the obvious reasons. They know romance is very powerful. And what do these romantic guys do? Simple things like, light candles, pick flowers, look at the stars, have a picnic or romantic dinner; nothing you can't do with ease.
Whether you want to believe it or not, it is the small things that matter most to a woman when it comes to romance.
Romance is the creation of an atmosphere where she feels unconditional love and appreciation. You can turn down the lights, turn on the radio, take her by the hand and ask her to dance in the kitchen. That's romance.
Hand her a wild flower, ask her to go on a stroll with you and hold hands. That's romance. Get it! What is she feeling? At that moment she is the most important woman in the world, she feels appreciated and loved. Romance can even produce the butterflies in her stomach.
The passion and excitement she will be feeling for you not only manifest itself in sex but will also spill over into other aspects of the relationship. Sometimes it takes a few romantic encounters to get the best results, she may not be used to it, she may have been hurt by you and think you're only doing it for sex. Hang in there, the payoff is within reach. Above all, you will have a fulfilling relationship and you will have fun discovering each other.
"Kiss: a secret told to the mouth instead of to the ear." Edmond Rostand
"The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story." Emil Ludwig
"A Kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous." Ingrid Bergman
"Kiss: a thing of use to no one, but prized by two." Robert Zwickey
"On the list of great inventions, kissing ranks higher than the Thermos bottle and the Airstream trailer; even higher than room service, probably because the main reason room service was created was so that people could stay in bed and kiss without starving." Tom Robbins
"Few men know how to kiss well; fortunately, I've always had time to teach them." Mae West
It is really doesn't know what the origin of kissing is. Perhaps it has been around as long as humans themselves, but few would argue that kissing is a very important part of how we connect with those we love, especially that special someone.
What makes a kiss really good and what does not? We have all had kisses that lingered long after the lips have departed. Those are the ones we long to have again. Here are a few simple rules to remember if you want your kisses to be memorable.
First and foremost, be present! The person who is fully present in the moment and engaged in his/her partner is very sexy and quite irresistible. Like a musical instrument, you may have the skill, but the true artist plays with soul. Kissing is no different. When you are fully focused on your partner and what is happening between you, your kiss will convey much more than the physical sensation of your lips touching.
Another important part of kissing is the amount of tension in your lips. Too much tension and you can't merge, too little and it's like a limp handshake. Full lips or thin does not matter. It is technique that is most important. Move your lips around a bit, don't stay static, movement is much more interesting. But be careful here. Too much tongue or too much of an open mouth in the beginning can be a turn off. Also, pay close attention to what your partner is doing and mirror it. Reflecting back his/her actions is one of the best ways to send the message of connection.
If you are kissing someone you really like or kissing a lover, don't be afraid to show how much you are enjoying it by nuzzling the neck or with groans, moans or sighs. These expressions of delight tell your partner what you like and that you are truly enjoying this kissing experience.
Avoid quick pecks on the lips or what I like to call "stamp" kisses. Pecks on the cheek for fun are fine, but if you are going to kiss on the lips, linger a while and give the kiss time to develop. Which reminds me, slooow doowwwn. What's the hurry? Take your time. Whether this is a first kiss or one with a long time partner, kissing is one of the most important and sensual ways we begin to make connection with a lover. Take it slow and enjoy the ride!
Is your heart bursting forth with love? Want to shout out to the whole world about how sweet your love is? Cute love quotes will help you to express loving thoughts about love, and as well as make you laugh with hilarity.
Whether you've just fallen head over heels in love, at the beginning stage of your relationship, or you just want to bask in the joy of your love, let these cute love quotes reflect your romantic and humorous side.
Let these humorous quotes about love give you something funny to smile about. Share these quotes with your family and friends so that they have something to smile about too.
There's many ways to bring joy and fun to your love relationship. Sending a bouquet of roses with a loving message when your lover is feeling down is romantic. Sending a love poem or writing one yourself is a hugely romantic gesture. Writing a wonderful love letter works also. Using a thesaurus and picking out descriptive words to describe the best sides of your sweetheart work amazingly well too.
Another method is to use cute love quotes in your Valentine's Day cards, emails and messages to bring a certain playful tone into your relationship. Make your girlfriend or boyfriend feel loved and cherished.
Add a dash of romance with these quotes and simply let the warmth of cute love quotes envelope you.
List of 10 Best Cute Love Quotes 1) "Other men have seen angels, But I have seen thee, And thou art enough." - G. Moore
2)"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." - Regina 'Age 10'
3) "I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox." - Woody Allen
4) "A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous." - Ingrid Bergman
5) "I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children, they just about throw up." - Barbara Bush
6) "Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love." - Albert Einstein
7) "We don't believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack." - Marie E. Eschenbach
8) "Women are made to be loved, not understood." - Oscar Wilde
9) "At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet." - Plato
10) "Love is like an hour glass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties." - Jules Renord
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Sixty-two percent of drivers have flirted with someone in another car.
So you’ve mastered the art of eye contact and can beckon a romantic prospect with just a few coy glances… but do you really know all there is to know about the fine art of flirting? Just to make sure you’re up to speed, we culled some very surprising information that you can use to your advantage. Read on for some juicy tidbits that may up your meet-cute quotient in no time.
1. Flirting is good for you. Studies show that people who flirt have higher white blood-cell counts, which boost both immunity and health.
2. Think batting your eyelashes is enough? Wrong! All told, scientists say there are 52 “flirting signals” used by humans. Of these, the hair-flip technique is the most common.
3. In some places, flirting is illegal. In Little Rock, AR, an antiquated law is still on the books warning that engaging in playful banter may result in a 30-day jail term. In New York City, another outdated law mandates that men may be fined $25 for gazing lasciviously at a female; a second conviction stipulates the offender wear a pair of blinders whenever he goes out for a walk.
4. Why wait for Friday? Lots of people get their flirt on during their morning commute. A full 62 percent of drivers have flirted with someone in a different vehicle while on the go, and 31 percent of those flirtations, it turns out, resulted in a date.
5. Flirting need not occur face to face. According to the Pew Research Center, 40 percent of people who look for love online say they can easily flirt with someone via email or IM.
6. In the Victorian era, fans were the ultimate playful props that could communicate all sorts of messages. A fan placed near the heart meant “You have won my love.” A half-opened fan pressed to the lips was an invitation, saying, “You may kiss me.” Hiding the eyes behind an open fan meant “I love you,” while opening and closing the fan several times was a chastisement, implying, “You are cruel.” Given how much a fan could come in handy, it’s a shame they ever invented air conditioning.
7. These days, cell phones do the flirting for you. In one survey, half of all mobile phone users have texted flirty messages to keep things interesting while separated from their amour.
8. Watch out; you can overdo it. According to the Social Issues Research Centre, the most common mistake people make when flirting is maintaining too much eye contact.
9. Sometimes, flirty gestures aren’t what they seem to be. Research has shown that men tend to routinely mistake friendly behavior for flirting.
10. Flirting is universal. A woman living in New York City and one in rural Cambodia may not have much in common, but when it comes to attracting a little attention, they both employ the very same move: smiling, arching their eyebrows, then averting their gaze and giggling. Animals flirt, too: birds, reptiles, and even fish have their own way of making romantic advances. The moral of the story: If the simple sea bass can act cute in order to further a romantic agenda, you can, too — so give it a go!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Summer should be a hotbed of sexy singles, so why are you striking out? Could it be one of these 10 reasons...
1. Changing your relationship status on Facebook after the first date
I am not lying when I tell you – this has happened to me. The first date went well (we were all over each other) and we definitely drank more than our fair share of wine. I was definitely excited for the next date. The next day, I got a very interesting notification in my mini-feed saying, “Sharon is no longer single.” I didn’t call her for that second date…
2. Only ordering salads when we go out on dates
Don’t be that girl! You’re not a rabbit – you’re a human. By all means, order a salad as your starter, but there is nothing sexier than a woman who knows how to chow down. I’m not telling you to lick your fingers clean at the end of your meal, I’m just telling you to eat like a normal person! A girl who has eating issues is a red flag, and something that we’d rather not get involved with.
3. Bad manicure (or lack thereof)
I’m going to go ahead and say that it’s worth it to spring for a pampering session. Though you might think we don’t notice, chipped nail polish or chewed down nails can be a quick turn-off. It tells us that you don’t care. I was on a date with a girl who seemed to have given herself a manicure while driving on a bumpy road. I mean…really?! I don’t mean to be “that guy,” but it just wasn’t cute.
Nothing sucks the excitement out of a relationship more quickly than when I’m wining and dining my lady and she whips out her iPhone so she can promptly answer emails from her boss. I’m all for a woman who works hard and enjoys what she does, but there’s a time and place for it – and it’s not when I’m trying to look into her eyes over a candlelit dinner.
5. Body hair
Men are bestial creatures. We’ve been hairy since adolescence and are forced to shave every morning if we don’t want to look like a hobo. One of the most refreshing things about a woman is how smooth she is. Don’t ruin this fantasy for us. Shave your legs and underarms, take care of any awkward facial hair you may have, and groom your nether regions!
Don’t resort to a baby voice to try and get something you want out of us. I’m not dating a 5-year-old, but a mature woman. Sometimes little girls use this tactic when they want extra spending cash at the mall. I’m not your dad. If you are missing something from me in a relationship, then tell me in your real voice and be confident – don’t cover it up because you’re scared about what my answer might be.
7. Deodorant issues
Of course you look stunning in your little black dress, and I certainly appreciate your classic choice, BUT before you leave the house, make sure your deodorant hasn’t rubbed off on your sleeves. There is nothing worse than being distracted by a girl’s pits or those accumulated clumps of deodorant on your underarms. I know it’s hard to prevent, but be mindful of it before you leave the house!
8. Don’ talk about your problems
Everybody has them – it’s just part of the human condition. Save it. Don’t dote on them and make them the only topic of conversation, seeking my advice or approval. If you’re having problems with your family, your ex, your hygiene…it’s just kind of a deal breaker. I’m out with you and trying to get to know the best you possible, so bringing unpleasant skeletons out of your closet leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.
9. Don’t forget your manners
One of my main rules as a man is classic chivalry. If I invite a woman out for dinner or drinks, I always pay, pull out her chair, and help her with her coat. It’s how I was raised. Don’t forget to say a simple “thank you.” It lets me know that you were raised with good manners and that you appreciate me. When a woman feels entitled to any sort of special treatment, it tells me that she is just a mean-spirited person. Manners are a must!
10. Only talk about yourself
Don’t forget that there are two people in a conversation. I listened so that I could score a first date, and because I was generally interested. Once you’re out on a date, I want to know that you’re also interested in getting to know more about me. Sometimes, in the nervousness of the moment it’s easy to forget to reciprocate questions. Be mindful of it.
So you’re looking for a boyfriend, but you just can’t seem to find him. You go out all the time and have great conversations with men. But, nothing comes out of them. You’re tired of waiting. Here’s the answer to your prayers: ask him out. Follow these steps and you’ll have a date on your calendar ASAP.
Take The Initiative
These days, women can get away with anything. We aren’t timid little people anymore. We’re strong and confident. If you’re in a social situation and you see a man you find attractive, take the initiative. Some men are too shy to approach a woman. So, instead of waiting for them, take matters into your own hands. Walk over to him and start a conversation.
Comfort is Key
Believe it or not, men aren’t foreign species. When they talk to a woman, they too like to feel comfortable. Tell your cutie that you like his shirt or that he has nice eyes. Compliments go a long way and are good ice breakers. If you make your cutie feel at ease, asking him out will be that much easier.
Flirt, Flirt, Flirt
When you’re flirting, you can never go wrong. Men of all ages appreciate some playful flirting. Be playful and sweet, but don’t come on too strong. If you make it known that you’re interested in him, he’ll know you’re going to ask him out.
Tell Me More
Everyone loves to talk about themselves. Be a good listener and get to know your man. Ask him questions that won’t scare him away. Remember, no one likes to be interviewed.
Go For The Gold
Be confident. Confidence is sexy. Instead of beating around the bush, come right out and say it. Tell your man that you’ve enjoyed talking to him and would love to hang out with him sometime. The worst he can say is no.
So, now that you know how to ask a guy out, go do it. Don’t be afraid. Fear isn’t attractive. Happy Dating!
If he plays music too loud, let them. But you could rehabilitate other unsavory behavior.
Most of the men treat women as ways to deal with football teams - we know very little and we are not eager to learn. But if your guy COUTH least, this does not mean you're stuck with a monkey. Men may change - but not too much at once. If your man social skills need a minor touch-up, here's how to manage it. But if his offensive behavior puts you always in a tight situation, the trade before he takes you with him.
Forgive and forget
These types of errors are more about personal taste than bad manners to try to ignore them instead of harassing to get your way:
You do not like the way he dresses.
It plays music too loud in the car.
He eats too fast / noise / unhealthy.
He does not deny the TV when you receive a phone call.
You disagree on how much to tip.
There are several ways to change its behavior, as he offered a trade of something he wants in exchange for custody of his ways. "My friend refused to tip over 15 percent," said Mary Stevens of Oak Bluffs, MA. "So we made a pact. If I think the point should be bigger, it puts extra money and I have to give him a back massage. "But trading is not necessary. Sure, you may struggle to change the characteristics that make your man an individual, but you may want to have more later.
So, unless its tweaks cause major conflicts (as if they affect your values, relationships with others, or well-being), let them go. "When you have to do favors to make a point, you're just making the best of being corrupt," says Harriette Cole advice columnist, co-host of "Pulse" on XM Satellite Radio's Take Five channel and author of choice of the truth: Living an authentic life. "We can live with a peak of 15 percent."
Fix it by diluting
By definition, some behaviors are rude, so if your guy a criminal, you can help it become the case. Some specific examples of when you can jump into effect:
He curses too.
His table manners are suspect.
He makes jokes about your relationship with your friends.
He makes no effort not to control his body sounds in public.
These types of behaviors occur because he does not know better. In such situations, it is not what you say but how you say it. Be honest. If your man is a guardian, he would not object to a little refining. "Give him a course of gentle in manners, so he can take with you wherever you go," Cole said. Some specifics: Do not embarrass him in front of people screaming. Wait a moment when you are alone together or can at least take him quite a place where others can not see or hear. This is not what you say but how you say it.
Be honest, but use a soft tone and not condescending. A line that never fails to say, "Darling, please listen to me one second. I want to help you see something you can not see. I think you do not realize how point he came through tonight, when you were (your boss cursing / joking about our love life / belching a lot). I think it gave people the wrong impression about you ... "Now you told him what was wrong, it can limit the damage - or both of you can understand how to solve it together. If you think he should apologize to someone, do not be afraid to tell him. "If he loves you, he would have noticed that you do not speak or behave in a certain way, and if you're supposed to be, it'll take a chance to redeem themselves," Cole promised.
Forget trying to make a silk purse out of this sow ear. Some behaviors are indicative of deeper problems that will not be solved by a simple conversation:
It is rude to people he does not know.
He is always right.
He is immature for his age.
It belittles you in front of people.
He is jealous of your friendship.
This ass is the reason Bumsville fathers are overprotective. It may seem romantic to date a bad boy who needs Fixin, but this character is broken beyond repair. "I dated a guy who did not like my friends, especially the guys," said Sarah Phillips, 27 San Francisco, CA. "He could not give me a concrete reason why he did not like them, so I dumped rather than abandon my friends."
It is tempting to stick with a bad boy, but you fool, it will not change. And the possessive or disrespectful behavior are often the first signs that a guy will become emotionally and even physically violent. Bottom line: You're too good for him. "It does not matter how cute - and generous - it is, if he has no idea about how to talk to you with respect, he does not deserve a second chance," said Cole. "It is like he is. Jump ship before you are locked"
Monday, August 9, 2010
Five signs your date is into you ...
1. She tilts her head
"When a woman sees and feels especially comfortable with a man, she will tilt her head," Hartley said. A tilt in any direction - right, left or down - are all signs she is interested in getting to know you better - for example, on a different date.
2. She takes a sip when you take a sip
When a woman is attracted to a guy, she'll instinctively mirror his actions, Hartley says. While men do this, too, women are more likely than men to first begin the copying. What should you look? "You may notice that she will pass her body in the same direction as yours or take your lead for behavior changes like picking up a glass to drink or blinking her eyes repeatedly if you are do, "he suggests. If you want to test her, lean forward and see if it approaches too.
3. She twirls her hair
Since the beginning of time, a woman's hair has been celebrated as a symbol of beauty and power. And it's true today, says Hartley: If your start date twirling or playing with her hair while talking to you is a good sign that she is in you and subconsciously trying to tell you attract.
4. She gets a glow
Often, the means blush of embarrassment, do not assume that her rosy cheeks are an indication of discomfort. When a woman is attracted to someone, the blood running down his face, causing her cheeks to get redder, Hartley explains. And if your date is smitten, he adds, her lips and even eyelids will get fuller, too.
5. His pupils dilate
While your gaze is fixed on her attention to her pupils, advises Hartley. "When a woman is attracted to a man, her pupils will dilate," he said. "Basically, the body does to afford to take more of a good thing."
... And five signs your date is not in you
1. She crosses her arms
Did she assume the position of Librarian angry? "When a woman on a date places her hands to her body - especially if they are crossed - she is closing itself of man," Hartley notes. If you receive this red flag, you have no chance ... and she wants you to know. "Men are not as insightful as women, although she is not aware of that, a woman knows her body language must be very strong," says Hartley. "In this case, that body language reads loud and clear."
2. She puts her bag between you two
"When I ask how male friends had a blind date, step by step, and they say'she put his bag on the table," I always know it's a bad sign, "Hartley said. If your date places her purse - a real barrier and physical - between the two of you, it shows she wants to create distance, he said. Not a good sign.
3. She speaks faster than an auctioneer
Then she seems to like talking to you? Before starting the festival, noted the speed of his conversation. "Romantic conversation does not occur at the same speed that the business conversation," Hartley said. "Conversation between two people who are attracted to the speed slows to about three-quarters and soften the tone. In fact, most emotional conversation - except when it is very hostile - is at a slower pace. "That said, it can be a bit nervous at the beginning of your first date, and nerves can cause her to spit her sentences in rapid-fire succession. But if at the end of the evening, it always goes at a pace Quick, consider it a clue that she just wants to be friends at best.
4. She offers a smile, chin-up
Although it is tempting to interpret any old smile as a sign of interest, all smiles are not created equal. Smiles can say a lot: "I'm polite," "I'm crazy about you," and, believe it or not, "I can not stick." The secret to decoding what her smile really means? Everything is in the chin placement. A woman who gives you a relaxed, chin down "soft smile" is smitten and wants you to dig back, "says Hartley. A smile toothpaste or stiff and polite smile - both of which generally involve the chin raised - means either "I love you as a friend" or "I want out of here!"
5. She strokes her neck
If your date tell you she agrees that you should get together again, it's a good sign, right? Maybe, says Hartley. "His body language can be the key to real truth," he said. "If a woman is gently stroking her neck when you say, there may be a sign she is interested, but it is also known to be a sign of lying. " To find out what message it sends, the aforementioned review "it is not into you" signals. If it also gives you a smile, raised chin and talk over a giant purse, you can miss your prospect.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Not only this men also find it extremely hard to approach successful or wealthy women just due to the fear of rejection. Some think they do not have the same prestigious position as the woman they are interested in and it would not work.
Not only is it about the wealth but also the level of education. This is an age of technology and competition. More and more women are achieving more success than males. The main problem here is that the males are build that way and find it very hard to cope up with a more dominant and successful female.
Most males have the dominant ego factor therefore they find it very hard to deal with a female being the dominant one in the family. It's all about the pride and men feel that their identity is being lost.
And this is one of the major reasons why men prefer dating less successful women than them. If a woman earns more than you, you probably would have to listen to her more and this gives her the dominant edge over you.
Not all men prefer to be followers most of them like to be the leaders when it comes to dating with women. Not only does this hurt a man's ego but also can cause social insults. Most men find it very hard to mix and mingle with the friends of his girl friend, spouse or a date. The society and the atmosphere changes and he would most probably be singled out as he does not have the same status and would be treated differently among the social groups.
Therefore in a nutshell most men have problems at home, work and social groups when they are dating a more successful woman. Their success levels do not meet and somewhere down the line the relationship suffers in the long run.
- When you leave then say goodbye and kiss your partner each time: It has been found that physical relationship faded after the few years of marriage. To keep the romance alive in your life you can try a goodbye kiss. In some of the occasions you can make this steamy. Even a peck can also help you in keeping the romance alive in your life.
- Try to use the line “I Love You” in your conversations: You can use this sentence when you are going on bed at night or when you are ending your conversation on the phone. You can always express your feeling of love with one another.
- Try to spend few times alone: The most common reasons that have been observed for the elimination of the romance from the life are the children, responsibilities and the work. Try to take out some hours from your busy schedule and spend some alone time with your partner. You will definitely improve your relationships.
- Play together: The most interesting fact regarding the romance is that it doesn’t evolve from candle light dinner or flowers. You can even play some games with your partner to inspire the romance in your marriage life. Such types of games may include the physical games like the mini-water fight. Always keep the entertainment in your games and try to include more fun in them.
- Laugh together: Laughter is considered to be the best medicine for inspiring joy, contentment, and other good feelings that are required in building a healthy relationship. But make sure laugh with your partner and not laugh at your partner. Try to include laughter in each day of your life.
- Pinch the butts: This may sound little silly, but the best part of the romance is to attract the partner in physical manner. You can generate the physical spark but pinching the bums of your spouse.
- Touch her: In order to initiate romance you can hold the hands of each other while walking or driving. You can even give hugs to each other and make sure that you must have some kind of physical contact with your partner daily.
- Take your meals together: It is not necessary that you must have to arrange time for special candle light dinners. You can even make the normal dinner romantic by sharing your goals, dreams and thoughts with each other.
- You can even serve each other and can even share some jokes with each other to live the lighter portion of the life.
After all, some may assume that the process of finding love online may not be workable. They may assume that the process is impersonal. Well, whether it is or not will be dependent upon the way you seek to find love online. The way to do it is through signing on with a paid dating site.
Many people will try to find love on line through social networking sites or through generic chat room to find someone they are interested in. There have been people that have achieved success with this strategy but it is not necessarily the best way to go. Why?
Well, the reason should be fairly obvious: the bulk of the people that are on these online venues are not looking for somebody to love. As such, a lot of time can be wasted visiting these sites. Instead, it is much better to look towards those online sites that are designed specifically for dating. Such sites are excellent for finding love online.
With a general online dating sites, people from all walks of life and interests sign on as members. They create profiles and can read the profiles of other people. Emails can be sent internally and instant messages and other forms of communications can be employed as well.
Of course, these sites allow for narrowing your search criteria in order to find someone that will be more compatible for your needs. This greatly enhances the potential to find love online.
And for those that would prefer to join websites that cater to more specified niches, this is certainly possible. There are a great many special interest dating sites available that can also offer a number of different segments of the dating population involved in signing on to these sites.
Whether you are looking for people from a specific background, interest, or hobby, you can locate an online dating site in that delivers on these wants and expectations.
The type of relationship you are looking for can be met on these online dating sites. Those looking for long term relationships can certainly find one and those seeking short term relationships can seek what they are after as well.
Additionally, those that are marriage minded can explore online dating venues while those seeking non-serious and non-committal relationships can do so as well. Since there are many hundreds of thousands of people looking for dating online, it should come as no surprise that there are all manner of relationships that can be sought online as well.
Ultimately, if you want to find love online there are really no impediments to doing so. Opportunity abounds!
But people have also simultaneously engaged in a debate that rages about the sustainability of the online chat. Clearly, there are two schools of thought. One school of thought believes that Internet relationships are not only a good thing to happen, but an online relationship is here to stay. The other school of thought believes that the online relationship is a temporal relationship and can provide momentary enjoyment. This school of thought believes that nothing beats the treaty relations as they are for the long term.
Obviously, these two schools of thought contain extreme views and probably the truth lies somewhere between the extreme views. Let us examine the viability of an online relationship from an unbiased perspective.
The main reason for online relationships have become so popular among many people around the world easy access to partners. In fact, many dating sites that establish a relationship internet for free. All one needs a computer, an Internet connection and a profile of at least one of the dating sites and you're good to go.
The sites act as a bridge between two people who are ready and it is entirely to people to take it from there. The main difference between an online relationship and a treaty relationship is probably the fact that if one can define its requirements and search for suitable partners as a result, contractual relations does not always allow one to plan its research partners.
But please be careful before committing too early in an online relationship, even if the chosen partner appears to meet all requirements. This is because there is no way to evaluate the credentials and intentions of dating her partner easily. There actually were some cases of lacerations and other unpleasant incidents simply because one partner acted in haste without checking the credentials and intentions of the other partner.
However, there were also many cases of online relationships maturing in a long-term relationships. Indeed, it is be careful and use discretion. If you are really in an online relationship for a short-term exercise, we are prepared for its imminent demise. However, for those who are looking for long term relationships, it is better to be cautious and slow in the beginning. This is the phase where we must carefully evaluate the information and, above all, the intentions of the other partner. This does not guarantee a long-term relationship, but certainly to avoid untoward incidents as dissension.
For more information Please visit dating sites for singles and free dating sites and dating sites free to read dating tips and relationship advice online internet relationships have been very popular these days This is because thousands of singles have found their partners online dating services internet So do relationships work.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
First of all, the most important thing is that your first date ideas are planned out. It doesn't really matter if you are a guy or a girl. If you are the person in charge of deciding on the data activities, then you need to have a solid plan. Although it doesn't have to be a complete schedule, you should at least have a good idea of some things you plan to do. You do not want to be stuck wondering what the two of you will do next when you are in the middle of your date.
Make it easy on yourself and craft your first date around the current season. If it is summertime, then try to get your date outside. Visit a park, a zoo, an amusement park or a racetrack.
If you live near the coast, you can go to the beach. This will give you a chance to see your date in some "summer clothing" and have some fun in the sun at the same time. If it is winter, then you may want to do something inside if the weather is bad. Try to eat at a nice restaurant with a romantic fireplace. Eventually, you could move your first date outside and into the snow. Go skating if there is a rink nearby, go sledding, or make a snowman.
If it is spring or fall, you could still try to do something outside as long as the weather is good. Having a picnic is always a fun idea for a first date. If weather is not so good, you can go to a play or musical performance.
Don't just limit yourself to just these first date ideas. If you think about it, the opportunities are nearly limitless on the things you can do.
Automatic watches are a perfect accessory to wear on any date. If you wear an automatic or self winding watch, be sure to pay a visit to Automatic Watch Winders for information about how Orbita Watch Winders can keep your timepiece wound up and ready to go for your date.
To have an effective interpersonal skills, one should know to communicate. Good communication is more than knowing how to express our thoughts, feelings and opinions. In fact, this is only half the process. Listening and understanding is the other half of the course requirement for interpersonal effectiveness.
Listening is actually attentive audience. We could learn a lot just by listening. And the ability to actively listen can improve relationships, because it promotes the understanding that would reduce conflicts and enhance cooperation. Science hearing showed that the modality of the language most commonly used is listening and nearly half the airtime is devoted to an adult to attend to what others say.
A transmitter, a receiver and a message: they are the basic components of listening. A shipper may be a person, or equipment (like TV, radio or other device that shows the progress in hearing science) that transmits a message to the receiver, which is the listener. The receiver must interpret the messages as they come and must cope with the rate of delivery, choice of words and structure of the grammar of the sender. The messages sent by the president are always an incorporeal substance, it is essential to become an active listener, to understand this information.
So how do we listen?
1. 100% attention. Listening is not as important to how we listen. We must devote our full attention to what others say. It is difficult to understand others if we are talking at the same time or if we do something while listening. While listening, start with an open mind. This could allow us to really focus and concentrate on others' posts. In addition, you must know to be careful to keep in mind and logical content of the object. This is done by listening to emotions rather than words to have a deeper understanding to what others say.
The first and most obvious step is to try to pin down what is wrong in your relationship. This is easier said than done, however. Sometimes, you only have an insight into your end of the things because of communication problems (a hint right there!). Or, you haven’t really listened to the clues your partner has been giving you as to why there are problems. So, the first thing you can do is to address your part of the equation. Has your partner been complaining about your behavior, words or actions? If so, really listen to what he or she is saying to recognize the problem on your end. If not, try to figure out if there is anything that you are doing or saying which is contributing to the problem.
The other part to this step is to try to determine what it is about your partner that is bothering you or causing the problems. Take some time to really think about this and how to express it in a constructive way. You should never attack or blame the other person entirely. This will only put them on the defensive which will make them unwilling to try to change.
The next step is to communicate! Really listen to your partner – don’t get defensive. Everyone is entitled to their feelings and to have them validated. Even if you don’t agree, you have to be willing to at least consider that you have some fault in the situation. Your partner will feel better if you agree to try to resolve their concerns. If you are the one with the concerns, approach your partner in a constructive way. You should always address the issues from your point of view. For example, you can say that your feelings are being hurt because of what they are saying to you instead of lashing out and saying he or she is doing something wrong. This will turn the issue into a two part equation instead of solely blaming the other person. Then, ask your partner for input into how he or she believes the problem can be solved before you start dictating what you think he or she should do. This validates your relationship as a partnership and makes both of you feel good about working towards a common goal.
How to cope with a separation? If someone has a break up then it should know the answer to this question. The relationships may weaken by small mistakes and losing its strength gradually a time comes when people decide to end up their relationship. This is the time when people think that they can not go along together. If there is no charm and attraction in your relationship then it would be good to separate. Even if it is a common decision, people become sad when separated. That is why they should know how to deal with a separation.
Dealing with a separation is very important because one may lose much more after a break up if it is not handled carefully. Usually after a break up people feel that they have failed in their life but this is a pessimistic thought. One should know that love is a part of life but not the whole life. You can get another love partner in your life but life is only once so you should try to spend your life in a better way. Moreover ups and downs are the part of life and one should have guts to go through it and one should learn from different phases of life.
If you want to deal with a separation then you have to be open for a new relationship. If you would shut the doors of your heart then you would never be happy and would stay alone. So, do not be cruel to yourself and try to find a better person for spending your future life. If your previous relationship was not flourishing then you should not be scared of making new relationship because there is a probability that you find a person better than your ex love partner. You would only be able to find a good new person when you would be aware of the flaws in your previous relationship.
If you want to deal with a break up and want to have normal life then you would have to behave normally. Do not change your behavior with the people around you. Even if you come across your ex love partner then you should behave casually. You casual behavior would help you to make your life even and easygoing. The ultimate aim of every person is to have a pleasant life and even after separation you have chance to make your life pleasing.
The author John Hill. has been writing on making people able to deal with break up in their life. If you need assistance on this then you may visit his websites dealing with a break up and dealing with broken heart.
Article Source: http://www.articlealley.com/article_1621759_35.html
Are you finally done with the dating world and you feel that the man you are with is the man you would like to spend the rest of your life with? Have had a stronger feeling than wanting to marry him now?
This was my problem too when I was at a turning point in my life when I realized that there is no other person for me but him. Although I had a big problem at this time because he did not seem to have any plans of asking me to marry him.
I am sure that it also frustrating for you because of the simple fact that you had to do something to get him to marry you. But let me tell you this, a relationship is a two way thing and it means that if sometimes you want something done you have got to stand on your feet and do something about it.
Never did I imagine myself in the situation I was in but I could not forget how it was for me. This led me to think that I needed to share my thoughts and experience on the matter.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
L'approche Art Print
27.5 in. x 27.5 in.
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Rendezvous Art Print
27.5 in. x 27.5 in.
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Sometimes words do not come easily when you are so deep and desperately in love. Trying to find the perfect words to describe how you feel can be a challenge. It is even this way for those who are normally very well spoken. You do not have to be short on words, if you follow a few suggestions.
When you try to describe how you feel about someone, using cliche terms can certainly be sweet and endearing, but the words come from the heart really romantic. As you spend time with your sweetheart, tell him all the things you look forward to sharing with him or her in life. For a man or a woman, on hearing of such hopes and dreams are more romantic than any amount of "I love you now." Telling someone how they really intend to give you and realistic reasons why is key when you think of romantic things to say. Tell your love that you will spend the rest of your life with them, or you can not see you with another person.
Telling someone they are beautiful is always wonderful, but why not move up a notch. Tell them what it is about them that is so beautiful. Is it my eyes or mouth that makes you even more in love with them whenever you see them? Adding personalization common sweet words go a long way to separate your words from cliché.
Tell your sweetheart you love a hundred different ways in a hundred different languages! Whether it's French, "I love you" or Spanish "Te Amo", the sound of words with universal meaning in a language different from the music to the ears. Of course, a simple "I love you" at the right time can be the most romantic story, you can say.
The key to the thinking of romantic things to say is nothing that says the truth. words of truth will be the most sincere and ultimately the most. Say what you feel truth is better than any other poem or quote. Your baby will love and romantic love is certainly nothing you say! Do not limit what you say to your friend mashed sweet words! Some of the most romantic moments can come from a moment of humor. Remember, laugh with others is often the key to a peaceful, loving relationship.
Think about it. One additional key to success. It sounds so incredibly simple! But think about it. A kiss is an emotional motivator that touches each one of us on so many different levels. A simple, beautiful act that infuses so much potential!
A kiss is an absolute emotional connection. It is an indication of acceptance and support. It is an overt commitment of togetherness and unity of mind and heart.
Indeed, it is another tool that can be used for success.
But it is a powerful tool, and must be used sincerely to be most effective.
I would propose a slight tweaking of the study’s results. If a good kiss produces good results, could you imagine what an even more intense kiss could do?
I would propose that we add conscientious kissing to our toolbox for success. Perhaps, we could even coin a new phrase, and call it Power Kissing! Learn to convey your excitement for one another’s daily success by Power Kissing each other. Kiss each other with more passion, even intimate passion! Drive one another into a delirious desire to succeed by your own display of affection and support each and every day before you step out the door to face the dragons of business and enterprise.
Simply put, there needs to be an increase of P.D.A. (public/private display of affection) in your everyday life.
Show one another that you care. Give each other the added measure of support that is needed to succeed!
2. Pick a spot in your yard and plant her / his favorite flowers. When they bloom you’ll have fresh cut flowers to enjoy or give.
3. Send your love and invitation for a midnight rendezvous. Meet on a hot summer night with a bottle of wine and a blanket.
4. Mow a heart shape into the grass.
5. Use sidewalk chalk to express your love.
6. Install a hammock or two seat swing to relax together on warm summer days.
7. Build a romantic outdoor sitting area as a surprise or together.
8. Plan a romantic getaway together; half the fun is talking about it.
9. Play summer games together such as horse shoes and croquet.
10. Light up the fire pit or patio stove and roast marshmallows for each other.
11. Take a stroll together at your local winery.
12. Sit in your yard and sip on lemonade while enjoying the summer together.
13. Decorate your patio with outside candles, torches or strings of lights for a romantic look at night.
14. Drive to a nearby town, park the car and walk hand and hand visiting the shops, restaurants and/or nightlife.
15. Absorb nature by visiting parks in your area. Walk slowly hand in hand, hike or just relax on the park bench.
16. Buy a smoothie maker and make Pina Coladas and daiquiris.
17. Decorate an area with a beach or Hawaiian theme. Have coconuts, lounge chairs, beach towels and maybe even sand. Serve tropical foods.
18. Spray paint a heart in the grass for your love to see.
19. Buy a book about stars and star gaze together.
20. Carve your names into a heart on a tree.
When equality is defined as equitable treatment under the law, even the staunchest conservative would probably agree with McElroy. “No one questions the concept of equal access to the Law; to a just and fair treatment for all in the Courts, before the bar of Justice,” says Jacob van Flossen, ultraconservative author of a 1998 political novel entitled Return of the Gods.
This basic concept of equality has been the broad legal intent in certain earlier cultures as well. Notable among them is first-century Jewish society. Under its laws, men were given definite instructions on their obligations to their wife’s needs, and women were endowed with inheritance and property rights not enjoyed by Western women until modern times.
Such a definition of equality doesn’t go far enough, however, to pacify adherents to all the numerous branches of feminism, particularly those known as gender feminists or radical feminists, who maintain that women will be oppressed as long as traditional gender roles are accepted by society. This form of feminism, like most others, is hard to pin down dogmatically, because the approaches to ending such “gender oppression” are as numerous as the individuals who seek to apply them. While some may go so far as to reject heterosexual relationships and/or advocate complete separation from patriarchal society in the belief that men are inherently evil, other gender feminists focus on changing media portrayal of gender differences or removing gender-specific pronouns from communication. The latter group, believing that equality simply means sameness, is trying to eliminate perceived differences between men and women.
But are there differences? And if so, is that a bad thing? Or does the idea of complementarity have some merit? Van Flossen asks, “By what compulsion do we make the denial of human difference—the denial of that which makes each of us unique—an ultimate goal?”
Danielle Crittenden, author of What Our Mothers Didn’t Tell Us, echoes his question: “Should men and women be trying to lead identical kinds of lives, or were there good reasons for the old divisions of labor? If so, do these divisions make us ‘unequal’?”
Feminist Germaine Greer, May 7, 1971 Photographic Print
11 in. x 14 in.
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What is feminism? When it first dawned on Betty Friedan that something was wrong with the role of women in society, she was not incorrect. Nor, of course, was she the first in history to notice, or the first to hit on an inadequate solution. The problem, as she articulated it, was the discontent of the average suburban housewife with a role perceived as smothering and unfulfilling, inferior and therefore unfair. Friedan’s book, The Feminine Mystique, was printed in the early 1960s and is considered the precursor to the so-called second wave of feminism, the first having been the suffrage movement begun the previous century.
While controversy surrounds Friedan’s claim that she spent 20 years as a bored housewife, and that this caused her to become a feminist, it is fair to acknowledge that there were a number of bored housewives in her generation and in the generations before hers. Whether they pursued feminism in any of its many forms as a result, or if not, why not, are questions worthy of pursuit.
Bored or not, however, housewives over the centuries have been the subject of many attempted solutions to the problem of establishing women’s role once and for all. To some the answer is a matriarchal society and the elimination of male violence, under the assumption that violence is a particularly male attribute. To others it is the complete subjugation and humiliation of women in order to “keep them in their place.” The treatment of women under Afghanistan’s Taliban regime is a reminder that even in modern times the pendulum can swing widely.
Generally, though, most in the West agree that men and women should be treated as equals and have equal value in the social order. But even that is open to many interpretations. Some modern feminists are pursuing what they refer to as “complementarity”—that is, equivalence that acknowledges sexual differences. Others suggest that such a concept actually threatens the equality that feminists have worked so hard for.
You’d like to think the success of a first date is all about chemistry, connection, good conversation… but sometimes, where you are and what you’re doing can play a key role in whether things go well or not. So, if you want to start a potential relationship off on good footing and don’t take your love interest on the following dates.
1. Family Functions
Your date will be nervous enough trying to impress you — don’t make someone audition for family and friends, too. Who needs that pressure?
2. Dance Clubs
Loud music, pulsing lights, guys without shirts… need we say more? Everyone’s on the prowl. That would be very uncomfortable.
You spend two lame hours staring at a screen, not getting to know each other…plus there’s always a risk the flick will contain a risqué scene that’ll create an awkward moment.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
The more you exercise, the more you need to eat a balanced diet. The nutritional rules still apply, but with an added carbohydrate intake. The combination of healthy food and physical exertion combats stress, encourages tissue repair, rebalances hormones and releases endorphins and encephalin. Mood and outlook should improve markedly.
To boost your sporting performance, you need glucose. The body makes glucose from starches and sugars in carbohydrates, including bread, potatoes and rice and stores it in the muscles and liver as glycogen. Like everyone else, sportspeople need protein, obtained mostly from pulses, poultry, red meat, fish, cheese, eggs and seeds, and vitamins, minerals and essential fatty acids. Sufficient fluids, particularly in advance of sport, are vital. You should also drink water during (if possible) and after exercise to replenish fluids.
The more you train, the more you need to eat a balanced diet. The dietary rules still apply, but with an added carbohydrate intake. The combination of healthy eating and physical stress of fighting effort, promotes tissue repair, rebalance hormones and releases endorphins and enkephalins. Mood and outlook should improve significantly.
To improve your sports performance, you need glucose. The body makes glucose from starches and sugars in carbohydrates, including bread, potatoes and rice and stores in muscles and liver as glycogen. Like everyone else, need protein Sport, made mainly from pulses, poultry, red meat, fish, cheese, eggs and grains, and vitamins, minerals and essential fatty acids. adequate liquid, especially in advance of the sport, are essential. You should also drink water during (if possible) and after exercise to replenish fluids.
If an intense exercise and fitness are an integral part of your life, you need to think long term and always stick to a balanced input, but varied food. Most athletes have a hearty breakfast and nutritious, especially the day of the event, and eat a diet rich in complex carbohydrates permanent.
Friday, July 2, 2010
You may have heard that if you stand criminal long enough, you'll eventually become one ... or if you hang out with people angry or depressed, Finally, you can become one of them as well.
After helping the men and women in their love life nearly a decade now, I must confirm the above theory to be true. You are who you associate with.
Here are some tests:
Check out these five people you spend the most time with. So ...
1) Ask yourself if you have similar interests.
2) Take their average income. See if your income equity are close to this average.
3) Take the average scores if you're still in school. See if your own notes are close.
4) Take their average success in dating. Check your success is near.
5) Take the number of hours they spend playing video games per week. (This is for teenagers.) Find the average and compare to yours.
6) Look at their success in life in general. Take average and compare to yours.
The test list can go on and on!
Now ... how it applies to dating and women?
Firstly, the most important point, I'm doing. Here it is very, very important to surround yourself with people that you want to emulate. Why? Because one way or another, the people around you influence you everyday actions and habits. So if you want to have a better life (whether in your career or your love life), you should look for those who live the life you want and simply allow their daily actions and habits influence your own behavior.
This test also works for women that you are interested in dating. Consider it a test of character. You can tell the character of a woman watching her five closest friends. For example, if his five best friends cheated before, I can almost guarantee you she cheats on you one day.
So keep in mind that the next time a woman speaks about her girlfriends cheating!